weak
7:18 PM
our father in heavenholy be your name
your kingdom comes
your will be done
on earth as it is in heaven
give us today our daily bread
forgive us our sins
as we forgive those who have sinned against us
do not bring us to the tests
but deliver us from evil
amen
hail mary full of grace
the lord is with you
blessed are you amongst women
and blessed is the fruit of your womb jesus
holy mary mother of god
pray for us
sinners now
and at the hour of our deaths
amen
dear god..
i have not prayed in a long time..
i have sinned..
please forgive me
for having suicidal thoughts again..
i feel overwhelmed by incompetence..
i know that you have a plan for everyone of us
and i should be patient..
and i should be thankful for what i have..
instead of feeling jealous.. of what others have..
seeing how pretty she is..
her docile eyes, her innocent face.. her saccharine smile..her porcelain skin..
her curvaceous body.. perfectly proportioned..
her whole self exuding with feminine sweetness
how she now has his smile.. his sight.. his love..
it is not difficult to understand why he was attracted to her..
even i could barely take my eyes off her
i cannot help but compare myself to her..
and to lose the competition
too pathetically..
there was no competition to begin with..
i am no match to her..
it would be an insult to her beauty..
it would almost be a sin..
i feel so.. so.. so terribly inadequate.
dear lord..
please give me the strength
to pull through this ordeal..
and to emerge stronger.. better..
please give me the wisdom..
to look beyond appearances..
and channel my energy towards improving myself from within..
my flaws should make me stronger..
and i will learn to appreciate what i am given with..
dear lord..
thank you for always being here for me..
during my darkest times..
a foolish mortal as i am..
i cannot see what you saw for me..
but i have faith..
that you will not lead me astray
and everything will eventually fall into place.
amen.